The Twenty-two Castles Of King Kong Kat
Togane jamming with Ba-àdle
(For Abdullahi Sheikh Elmi “Watoosi” from Hutu Togane)
You are what you repeat.
—Aristotle
There are two things that bear repeating
Singing songs of gratitude & praise to God
&
Walking after the fleshy fat fanny of a Majerten maid.
—An Abgal folk Somali saying
I
Sneaking off
Out on an all-night-long tear of a trip
Out cold on an ocean of Arabian tea
On a wild jaad jag of a chase
After African tea
Running off at the mouth all night long
Seldom slinking home to sleep it off
Belong to you o sleepless insomniac qaat.
II
Hundreds of dead-end designs desires dirty devices
Hundreds of castles
Built
In white nights of black lies
Fortified
By booze
By blarney
By baloney
By balderdash
By bullshit
By bushwa
By blather
By palaver
By powwow
By wow
By how
By hooey
By woe
By no
By nyet ni katova
Belong to you o motor mouth muncher moocher.
III
Fitful sleep
Bucking nightmares
Buffeting somniloquy
Woeful wakefulness
Jumpy
With jinnee
With jitters
With jimjams
Belong to you o jinnee jaat.
IV
Heart-felt
Heart-throbbing desire
That is burning
Hot
Heavy
Horny
And a dangling dead dick shriveled upon shrunken balls
That can’t cut the pussy’s mustard
That can’t bounce & dance on hairy holy holes
That can’t jump for joy
Into juicy malleable meable mortars
Belong to you o crippled cat.
V
Late Laughter into the wee hours of the night
Shtupped
Strumpeted
Stumped
Stamped
Stunned
Topped
Trumped
Trumpeted
By lamentation
Belongs to you o Kaffir kat.
VI
Clanism
The most insidious sort of Somali KKK racism
Loss of Ee-maan
Loss of faith in Allah
Loss of faith in one’s very own identity
Belong to you o black infidel gaal gadabout.
VII
Poverty
That is nigger rich
That plays being a millionaire for the night
That never pays off
That shoots its wad all the time
That plays ducks & drakes
With all its might & main
With all its wherewithal
Fantasy & fatude
Faanfaan & fanfaronade
Belong to you o jittery jaat.
VIII
A slick sick sucker such as you o jaad
With dead lusterless useless staring eyes
That can’t blink
With stinking smelly nigger sweat
With sticky kat sick shtick
Is jumped
Is jammed
Is rammed
Is rimmed
Is raped
Is rapined
Is run over
By incubus
By succubus
By Queen Mab.
IX
Hallucination
Horror
Harlots
Hirelings
Hell herself
Belong to you o katzenjammer kat.
X
Gorging on jaat
Denying dear ones
Their daily denar
Their daily bread
Their daily word
Belong to you o cheating jaat.
XI
Broken homes
Broken hearts
Rows & recriminations
Regrets & remorse
Rues & ruinations
Belong to you o contrary cat.
XII
Ninnies
Who can’t get it up
Who can’t pop a boner
Who can’t scratch where they itch
Who can’t bless
Who can’t baptize where they burn
Who have a mouth but nothing to eat it with
Who are comatose with despair disgrace disgust
Who Always crawl back to you o cat for comforting cunnilingus
Permanently belong to you.
XIII
Neighing nags
Who are loony with lust
Who are bellicose with disgust & disquiet
Belong to you o impotent non-electric nada eel.
XIV
A famished belly feasting
Upon piles
Upon piles of boundless bundles of kat twiggy turds
Upon which to rue ruminate run aground & maroon
Belongs to you o kinky stinky slinky Arabian Sea of sixes & sevens.
XV
A hapless helpless hopeless hungry heart
Burnt crisp
Burnt black
Sucking
Sighing
Signaling
For yet another deceiving dissatisfying disgusting cigarette
For yet another coughing furious fitful farting fit
Belongs to you o breathless bummer.
XVI
Cadging
Begging
Borrowing
Stealing
Robbing Mahammad to pay Mahamud
Praying
Pleading
Pestering your very own peers
For a touch
For a hit
For a handout
For one more bundle of bringdown
For one more angry fix
On dead-end qaat qurun streets
Feeling
No shyness
No shame
No embarrassment
Belong to you o shameless sharmoot
Who never scats
Who always scams
Who is always
In a jam
In Queer Street.
XVII
Walking off with whatever you want
Never paying back what you owe
Never owning up
To what you have become now
An ogre on a short jaat leash
With no leeway
With no mercy
With no way out
Belong to you o jailing jaat.
XVIII
Thievery
Robbery
Russian roulette
Gambling at gunpoint
Playing ducks & drakes
Belong to you o daredevil dimwit.
XIX
Frenzied mindless mobs
Merciless moriyan
Pitiless bandits of bayaye
From the boondocks of mugdi Mudug
Stampeding
Clashing
Clamoring
Coons with Kalashnikovs
Killing
For kicks
Killing
For kat
Belong to you o thirsty juiceless useless Djenoun jejune jaad.
XX
Jaat lotus-eaters
Too spaced out
Too slothful
To hie home
To shit
To shave
To shower
Belong to you o constipated king.
XXI
A stinking sour sooty sewer mouth
Rip-roaring
Bristling
With sooty black old rotten tooth stumps
That always grimaces
Behind the bootless protection of paws
That never
Tripped up
Tackled
Tussled
Or
Tangoed
With a toothbrush
Belongs to you o you toothless tief.
XXII
War Jama-o
Ninkee jaad unaa
Gusku woo jil-à!
O Jama
O Jim
O Mr. Bojangles
If you wanna keep on jumping so high
Eschew jaad
For if you ever chew jaad
Your jumper
Your dancer
Your hammer
Your jammer
Your juicer
Your jimmy
Your jinnee
Gets chewed up by jaad
To a stumpy lumpy useless pulp
Softer than jelly roll
Softer than Bill Cosby’s yellow mellow Jell-O.
